Bickering Boys

My son D, a tween, always gets into an argument with his little brother C.  Those who have boys  know that it's a rare scenario for one party to give in. In our language, we say walang nagpapatalo. 

At times, I allow them to sort it out themselves.  Sometimes, I have to step in with a "Guys, stop it!" and/or  "I will ground both of you!".  But that won't really help in the long-run, would it?

A few days back, while preparing breakfast, the bickering started like this.

C :  "Mommy, Kuya stepped on my hand on the sofa."

D :   "I did not! I was just reading!"

C :   "Yes, you did!"
D :   "I did not!"

It was a beautiful, sunny Saturday and my mood was still quite pleasant. I found myself saying :

"D, I know you would not do something like that. But sometimes, we do things that hurt somebody, without intending to. Do you think you could have stepped on C's hand while you were shifting your seating position.?"  (I can't believe how patient I was! I didn't sound like me at all!)  He nodded.

I continued, "You are the kuya (older brother), you have to take the action to end the argument. If you don't, what do you think will happen?"

D : "We'll just continue arguing till both of us get really mad."

Me again :  "Exactly!  If you think you are at fault, simply apologize, and say you did not mean it."

He did. C hugged his kuya and softly said "Ok".

This afternoon, I heard them again arguing. Surprise, surprise! I heard D say he is sorry, and C accepted the apologies. End of argument.

I don't kid myself into thinking they'd live together peacefully and happily ever after. For a day or two, at least, there's peace. Maybe Israel and Palestine can try this :)