Is Your Workplace Like This?

I was reading the book "A Colossal Failure of Common Sense" by Larry McDonald.  (It's obvious from the title - the book is about the collapse of  Lehman Brothers. Even without reading the book, anyone could tell uncontrolled greed is the main reason behind the recent financial meltdown. This book is a good read.)

I'm not writing about the global financial crisis.

First, some background info. The author and a friend started a website, offering information about convertible bonds. Loads of hardwork researching and offering information about the bonds offered in the market, as well as their evaluation of those bonds - which ones are worth buying and which are crap - made their website popular. Morgan Stanley bought them off, and the 2 friends became dotcom multi-millionaires.

Moving to MS, they felt the huge difference between how things work and get done in their start-up company and in an organization like MS.

In Chapter 3 of his book, the author said :

"The whole ethos of a major company is different. There’s people forever trying to cover their own asses, people who have somehow carved an entire career out of making small but telling criticisms of other people’s work. That’s because in a big corporation, the guy who spots a screw-up is somehow cleverer and more valuable than the guy who wrote the forty-page marketing plan in the first place."

Nice!  So eloquently put, don't you think?

Have you worked with people like that?  Made you feel like you want to smack them in the face hahaha

My three common-sensical take-aways :

1.  The colossal failure of common sense is if the head of any company allow such culture to permeate, much less flourish in the organization. My view - that will only happen if the head is like that himself. The leader sets the tone, pace, values in the organization. The buck stops with him/her.

2. Learn to be thick-skinned. One cannot avoid presenting to smart people (and smart-a__s).  Gotta learn to deal with them -- if the tough question is from the smart ones, they're adding value.  Don't be on the defensive. If from the smart-a_s, maybe say "that's a good question, what do you think we should do?".  

3.  Focus on doing excellent work, in adding value. Be sincere, no matter if everyone else isn't. (I think I've experienced that!)  Be a role model and contribute to creating a culture that builds values.

Family Meals Matter - A Lot!

During a visit to my parents

Our family holds fast to our tradition of eating meals together.

Growing up in the province, we always have dinner together. Same with Sunday lunches. Everyone was expected to be home by dinner time. I don't recall much about what we talked about during meal times - local politics maybe, even what's latest about the neighbors :)

Studies show that having regular family dinner helps children get better nutrition, also better grades. Plus it reduces the likelihood of them smoking, getting into drugs, having eating disorders, getting into trouble. I read this first years ago as a feature article in a Sunday newspaper. Google "benefits of family dinner"  and lots of websites (like the 2 below) will pop out.

http://www.mealsmatter.org/Articles-And-Resources/Healthy-Living-Articles/Family-Meals.aspx

http://children.webmd.com/guide/family-dinners-are-important

We didn't have to read articles like these to know. When we started our family, my husband and I didn't even have to discuss it - we instinctively knew that family meals was the natural thing to do. Sharing our daily lives is an essential part of being a family, not just sharing last names and living under one roof.

The kids set the table. They like having their own
identifiable cup or glass to drink from :)

I look forward to dinnertime. We get to share how our day was. The other night, we talked about the boys' visit to a vegetarian restaurant, a class field trip - we asked what did they eat, how did it taste, did they try something new...When eating together, we get to notice also when someone is unusually quiet, or has a bad cough, or has long, dirty fingernails that need trimming :)  Big or small, these concerns need our attention and early intervention... During weekends, they help prepare the food, set the table and do the dishes...We believe the talks and the tasks contribute to character-building, to shaping their views about life, about the world.

I've read an article on how family dinners are good for parents, too. Not just for the kids.
http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2008/07/the_macandcheese_effect.html

Great findings but does it take research to know that? The family is a unit, a whole - one part gets problematic, the rest gets affected. And vice-versa. Don't parents feel happy and fulfilled when their kids are doing well in school, behaving properly and growing up responsibly? I do. I believe most parents do. It's a no-brainer, in my view.

As a working mom over the past 20 years, I know I have missed countless opportunities to network and build professional relationships - over dinner or even weekends;  I go when necessary but not that active :)I don't have regrets. My kids are doing well in school, they are thoughtful and caring, helpful at home. Call me simple but this for me is happiness.

Sunday Lunch at Ngon Restaurant

We usually go out for lunch on Sundays.  It's a simple way of breaking the monotony of the week, especially for the kids.  After all, Sunday is rest day.

We like Vietnamese food. Simple, flavorful, with lots of greens/veggies so healthier, I suppose.  One of our favorites in Saigon is Ngon restaurant in Hai Ba Trung St.

The restaurant is in a colonial French villa, with high-ceilings and tall windows;  though usually crowded, the place is airy and charming, especially at night. 

It's different from the older Quan An Ngon.  Both are very popular with tourists, with similar concept of having some of the best streetfood in Saigon housed under one roof.  The kids liked to go around the food stalls, watching the food being prepared - steaming soup which servers ladle from huge cauldrons to bowls, greens and fresh herbs, glutinous rice dishes with various types of fillings, skewered chicken/beef/pork being barbecued...

Vietnamese fastfood,
with the dishes assembled upon ordering



Che (sweets/desserts) in earthen pots,
mostly cooked in coconut milk



We went there for lunch today.  It's our maid's day-off, and I wasn't in the mood to cook. The place was bustling as usual.  Cha gio as starter, then we each had noodles or rice as main dish and a dessert - the bill came up to less than VND 600k/US$60. Quite reasonable and we all felt full and satisfied.

Cha Gio (Vietnamese fried spring roll)



Steamed rice with porkchop
and shredded porkskin